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Ron Swanson Quotes

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  1. If any of you need anything at all: too bad. Deal with your problems yourselves like adults.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory 7 months ago

    5 loves

    1. funny
    2. tv
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  2. When people get too chummy with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to let them know I don't really care about them.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory 8 months ago

    8 loves

    1. funny
    2. tv
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  3. On my deathbed, my final wish is to have my ex-wives rush to my side so I can use my dying breath to tell them both to go to hell one last time.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory 12 months ago

    2 loves

    1. funny
    2. tv
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  4. I got my first job when I was nine. Child labor laws are ruining this country.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory 12 months ago

    2 loves

    1. funny
    2. tv
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  5. Fishing relaxes me; it's like yoga, except I still get to kill something.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory about 1 year ago

    3 loves

    1. fishing
    2. relaxation
    3. tv
    4. yoga
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  6. Capitalism is God's way of determining who is smart and who is poor.

    — Ron Swanson

    Submitted by paulfedory over 1 year ago

    1 love

    1. capitalism
    2. god
    3. poor
    4. smart
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